Posts tagged: help

I Have My Limitations

What is life coaching? What does it mean? How can it help?

A seagull flies over the incoming tide

Happy New Year 2016

Three times this week I have met lovely people on the beach and been asked about coaching: what is it; how do I work; what does it mean?

This morning, because of another conversation elsewhere (on Facebook), this is my answer…

(It might be different on other mornings)


I have my limitations.

I believe that what I believe is just belief
and I believe that this belief is enough
and I believe that being enough is me.

Do I have hope, purpose and love?
Yes I have hope, purpose and love
because I have something greater than all of these.

Can I help you find hope, purpose and love?
Can I help you believe?

I have my limitations.
I can only hold up a mirror
a mirror so ancient is shows you your past and beyond
so ancient it shows you a future where you can believe
so ancient it shows you belief is just a belief
that being who you are being is being enough.

That you are greater than all of these.

We Dream of Flying

Everyone in this House

Everyone in this house has dreamed of flying
as fires cool and clocks tick unhurried.

We have all lain
in the warm arms of love.

We have sung and listened to song
whispered and received secret joys
anticipated with a thrill
lost and found
reached out

We have all lain
in the warm arms of love.

As fire cools and clocks tick
I dream of flying.


There are some classic NLP questions that never cease to amaze me with the power of their simplicity and the simplicity of their power.

The conversations tend to go along these lines:

            What do you want?
             I don’t know.
             And if you did know, what would you want?

            How would it be if..?
            I don’t know.
            And if you did know, how would that be?

           What’s holding you back?
           I’m just stuck.
           What would it take for you to be unstuck?


Coaching Myself with NLP and Poetry
This morning I woke up thinking, I don’t know whether I have a poem in me today. So I asked myself some questions:


If I did have a poem in me today, what would it be about?
It would be about dreaming, or flying.

 How would it be if I wrote a poem about dreaming or flying?
 It would be like dreaming and it would be like flying.

So, what would it take for me to be unstuck?
If I wrote the line ‘I dreamed of flying’ that would get me started.


In fact when I started typing, I found myself writing ‘Everyone in this house has dreamed of flying’ and the lines simply came, one after the other, exactly as you see them on the page now.

Of course this poem probably isn’t finished. There is always the possibility of drafting and redrafting but sometimes a simple poem can be powerful and this might be one of those.  it is too soon to know, but what I do know is that those NLP questions were a great help in getting me writing again.


This is poem 13 for National Poetry Writing Month.


Writer’s Block

What might I ask someone who is stuck?

It’s not unusual for a client to say “I just feel stuck.”  It might be ‘Stuck with my relationship’, ‘Stuck with my job, my writing, my art’, or ‘Just stuck in life generally’.

People will say “I have tried everything I can think of to make changes in my life but nothing has worked”.  One of the things we can do together is come up with some new ways of looking; new perspectives; and instead of thinking about difficult times, things other people have said, or things that  happened in the past, I might ask you to think of a special place.

Place is often overlooked and yet often there will always be places that are important to us.  If I say to you, “Think of a place that is special to you”, you will probably go somewhere in your imagination, you have probably gone there now. With a little coaching you will find that what that place says can be profound, moving or just plain fascinating.

National Poetry Writing Month button


I decided to use this as a starting point for myself this morning’s poem for National Poetry Writing Month.  Here’s the poem and you will probably see how the sense of place triggered an important message for me about my writing…

Looking out of a window onto a winter scene

You came here to create
discovered death and left
and now the hour is growing late.

There is no time to waste.
This is not time to rest.
You came here to create.

Test the hours and feel their weight,
embracing life, embracing death,
now the hour is growing late.

Draw a line and draw it straight
embrace the seasons’ warp and weft.
You came here to create.

This is not destiny or fate.
I do not doubt that you have wept
but now the hour is growing late

and you know what this indicates.
Don’t waste the time that you have left.
You came here to create
and now the hour is growing late.

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